Focus on one thing

Work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. The other four balls-- family, health, friends, integrity - are made of glass. If you drop one of these, it will be irrevocably scuffed, nicked, perhaps even shattered.

~ Gary Keller

Have you ever experienced a time when you were so engrossed in a project that you were oblivious to anything else?

Time seems to collapse. We forget what ails us. We have tunnel vision and are oblivious to what is happening around us.

Last weekend, we planned an impromptu extended family holiday brunch that will take place this Sunday.

Having done that, I decided it was time to create our annual family calendars that capture memories and milestones from the previous year.

To get it back within seven days for gift-giving, I had to submit it for print by the end of the weekend.

Because I seldom capture the memories myself, I had to find shared high-resolution photos and place them all in an accessible folder for upload.

Going through emails, texts and other messages, checking for quality, reaching out to family members for originals, and airdropping from one device to another was very time-consuming.

When all was done and submitted, I realized I had made a significant mistake. I attempted to cancel and send it again. But, the software was uncooperative. Although the calendars would be printed in Quebec, and the production facility was closed, the message I got was, “In production”. Not fun!

I tried calling, online chatting and emailing to solve the problem. No one was available to help. I got messages that someone would get back to me within 48 hours.

Because this task is aligned with my core value of family, I was determined to succeed.

I had to restart, a daunting task given the labels and clip art I’d applied. The software did not facilitate using the original submission as a base for change. I worked late into the night to resubmit.

Monday morning, when I woke up and stepped on the scales, I noticed I’d lost a few pounds. Not surprising. I wasn’t hungry while working. I was in flow and eager to return to the task at hand.

Reflecting on this experience

Don’t let pain define you, let it refine you.

~ Tim Fargo

It is a privilege to be able to focus on one thing.

If our granddaughter had been with us last weekend, as she is now, I would not have prioritized calendars. I’m writing this after she’s gone to bed.

I will save pictures in high resolution for next year's calendar, as they are presented to me. By sharing this with you, I am inclined to be more organized.

Meaningful busyness promotes health

Flow is being completely involved in an activity for its own sake. The ego falls away. Time flies. Every action, movement, and thought follows inevitably from the previous one, like playing jazz.

~ Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

It is wise to re-evaluate the things we do habitually.

Dopamine, a feel-good neurotransmitter, is released when the brain is expecting a reward.

Sometimes we eat not because we are hungry or nutrient-deprived but because we are bored.

Other times we shop not because we or others need things but for that feel-good chemistry. For some, shopping may be a coping mechanism to overcome holiday stress. We turn gift-giving into a must-do project, a distraction, without ever re-evaluating the tradition.

Compassionate inquiry is wise.

Focus on one thing

If you chase two rabbits, you will catch neither one.

~ Russian Proverb

Work-life balance has captured a lot of attention lately. But it sounds like an unachievable goal. We juggle a lot of balls - family, health, friends, integrity and work.

Scattered minds, fear of missing out (FOMO) and multitasking reduce efficiency. High-performance coaches tell us to focus on "the one thing", to be in flow or in the zone to achieve success.

But, to focus exclusively on one thing, we rely on many other people to compensate for our neglect of other tasks. Unless genuine appreciation and recognition are shown we risk losing the privilege.

Young adults need to prioritize careers until they become self-sufficient, able to provide for themselves and live independently.

Starting a family is a reasonable goal when they have achieved some financial independence and mental stability. Having children but being unable to give them the love and attention they need to thrive has contributed to the mental health epidemic.

World peace starts with healthy early childhood development. We have to become selfless to raise resilient children. For that, someone has to lovingly prioritize their every need early on and teach them to become self-sufficient as time progresses.