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Writer's pictureMary Maciel Pearson

Reflecting on a dysfunctional behaviour


We do not lead others into the Light by stepping into the darkness with them.


~ Melody Beattie 


I write my own story. 


I shape my reality. 


I feel powerful most of the time.


I believe we are here to provide service for the greater good. 


But I have a problem. At times, I assume a disproportionate amount of responsibility for the afflictions of others. 


When a loved one presents with a health or wellness challenge, it mobilizes me into action. I blame myself and ponder what I could have done better to prevent the suffering. Feeling responsible, I do everything in my power to reduce the burden. 


Sometimes, I overdo it.


As I reflect, I realize that not only is my disproportionate sense of responsibility taxing, but it also creates dependence. Am I interfering with the gift of a challenge to facilitate growth and transformation in others?


I wonder how this tendency is serving me. What do I gain from this arrangement? What do I lose? Is this about feeling a disproportionate need to earn my keep?


I do not have all the answers, but today, I let go of this dysfunctional behaviour that limits my ability to contribute more widely. 


Embracing interdependence


Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly. I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be. This is the interrelated structure of reality.


~ Martin Luther King, Jr.


Interdependence is human nature. Our survival and success depend on cooperation and reciprocity with others. It's give and take.


I am willing to receive. 


I am worthy. 


I am enough.

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