Think well to age well

Age imprints more wrinkles in the mind than it does on the face.

~ Michel Eyquem de Montaigne

Aging well starts with changing limiting thoughts and beliefs, personally and collectively.

How we perceive, define and accept the aging process impacts our experience as time progresses.

Decaying or maturing?

The way you see people is the way you treat them, and the way you treat them is what they become.

~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Cultures that value youth and physical beauty above all and define aging as decay or physical deterioration are more likely to choose to fight the aging process.

In places where people see aging as maturing or becoming wiser, the elderly are not a burden or hindrance. They are revered, and according to research done in The Blue Zones and Harvard, contribute more and enjoy a longer health span (the number of years without debilitating disease conditions).

Thou shouldst not have been old till thou hadst been wise.

~ William Shakespeare

Wisdom is the opposite of self-absorption. It necessitates that we reflect upon our successes and failures at different stages in life, accept what we cannot change, have the courage to change what we can (as in the serenity prayer) and become competent at sharing what we learn and unlearn.

Find a reason to get up in the morning

When you find your WHY, you don't hit snooze no more! You find a way to make it happen!

~ Eric Thomas

High-performance coaches recognize that moving towards something rather than away from something yields better results.

In our post-reproductive years, we often experience fatigue. We become hungry for change, aspiring for time away from the demands of childrearing and career. We crave me-time.

But, occasionally, when we finally get that wealth of time, we experience a loss of identity and dis-ease.

Such feelings may have been present all along. We have just distracted ourselves from addressing them, often numbing with substances, work and other preoccupations that create natural boundaries.

If we believe an aging body degenerates, the degeneration can happen quickly at this stage - unless we change our minds.

Prevention has become synonymous with testing and medical intervention in our healthcare system.

We have turned aging into a disease that longevity experts want to cure or help mitigate with lifestyle hacks, hormones, injections, surgeries, lasers, lotions and potions.

But, none of these interventions offer sustainable well-being unless we find meaningful new objectives. What we need is a big WHY to get up in the morning.

Closing thoughts

Every flower must grow through dirt.

~ Laurie Jean Sennott

Re-framing aging as maturing and finding a reason to bounce out of bed in the morning will increase healthspan.

Through advancing age filled with rich experiences reflected upon, we can progress and find ourselves in a place where we can help impart wisdom. It is through helping others that we help ourselves.

For me, what does aging well look like right now?

The only thing that can save us as a species is seeing how we're not thinking about future generations in the way we live.

~ Erik Erikson

Psychoanalyst, Erik Erikson, coined the term Generativity to describe the stage of life I'm in. Generativity denotes the capacity to unselfishly guide and nurture future generations.

Rather than reducing time spent with the younger age groups, or placing demands on them, adding value to their lives by stepping in to help upon request has increased my sense of self-worth, vitality and competence.

If we are the average of the five people we hang with most, why not hang with the young, adventurous and vital? They will challenge us to step outside our comfort zone - to embrace discomfort which facilitates growth.

Our children bring out our can-do attitude. Mindset matters when it comes to aging.

As an example, every day this week, I have plunged into ice-cold water, at times having to break the ice to get in. Cold exposure reduces the fragility of the body, mind and spirit. I wouldn't do this if not nudged to, by our offspring.

Aging is inevitable - and desirable given the alternative. Let’s embrace it and do it well.